Peer Review- Laura Nash

Hi Laura,

May I just say what a fascinating piece of writing you have produced. I really love how you have taken Judith Beveridge’s ‘How to love Bats’ and changed it to tell the story of something you love, Wolves. I really admire the form and style in which you have chosen to write. I recall Judith saying how young writers tend to end their lines at the natural grammatical breaks, however, poetry enjoys the break that comes unexpectedly. I can see that you have in fact adopted this in your writing and I emphatically believe that in doing so, it makes your poem so much more engrossing as you eagerly wait and question the ending.

I really like how you have also incorporated auditory and olfactory imagery into your poem. “Listen to the crunch of leaves” and “Stop to smell a buttercup.” This helps the reader create an image in their mind and allows them to feel like they are part of the story.

Your ability to describe the wolves, their mannerisms and the environment in which they roam so eloquently are what really makes your poem so fantastic, “blood loving tongue lolling” is just one example that stood out to me.

There was only one tiny grammatical suggestion I found in your poem which was in the line “Listen, guttural how of longing, domination and belonging.” Your sentence here contains a series of three or more words, phrases or clauses so you can consider inserting a comma before ‘and’ to separate the elements.

Apart from that tiny pickup, your poem was fantastic and you should be very proud of this piece.


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